Jones Soda + Welch's Grape Juice = Free Refill's of Love

Howdy ya'll! Welcome to my blog!

What a crazy flurry my life has been lately! Whoa! I'm just going to let it all out here. On New Years 2010 I had a hunch that this year was going to be my year- but I had no idea how much that would be true on every level. To lay the backdrop to how excited and happy this feeling made me, lets just consolidate the past five years into a little bundle called "an unfortunate series of worst case scenario events." Not to be down on life (because we all know how optimistic I am) but, let's be honest, things have been just a little messy for a few years, or, at the very least, less than favorable. No need to belabor the retelling of certain details, but I had, in fact, become so used to the fact that things so rarely went in my favor that I decided to just relent to the facts and embrace it as my lot. The people around me who love me embraced it too, sadly, because none of us honestly knew if or when things would ever turn around! The secret ninja backup plan I created the last few weeks of my mission to run off and join the Navy (which I still defend as sane and reasonable), became more appealing by the minute-- hey, at least it was profitable-- I could get paid well and travel the world while putting up with whatever nonsense was going to creep in anyway, why not? This was my year. I was finally going to press forward fearlessly in the direction of my own best interest, one more time, with every strand of my heart that I could recover.

So here we are- almost halfway through the year 2010, and what has become of me? On February 15, after a year of adequately pretending not to notice that I was treated with less regard than a doormat at work, I decided to intruduce myself properly. Of course, this was only feasable by quitting, because (a) there is no coming back from being a doormat, and (b) I had a lot to say, and I needed the message to get through. My greatest contribution to the company actually turned out to be my exit, because Michaela left too, and then the people with the power had no choice but to listen to and see and act on what they would not listen to or see or act on before. What gave me the conviction to do this was a small but consequential act on January 1, 2010 at about 2am, which set the precedent to everything going right this year. After I saw a friend from the past who turned out to be pretty bad friend after all, I greeted him with love and then, when I turned to go, I just didn't look back.

One week later, I went on my first date with Brigham Del Welch.

Lets just say that if my life were a gameboard with a spinny-wheel arrow that you flick and spin, and then anticipate which stripe the arrow will land on, that's about the extent to which I was able to anticipate that Brigham and I would (a) ever go on a date and (b) fall crazy in love. The impact that that one single date has had on everything in my life is incalculable even now. Talk about unexpected drama. Consider the odds that one of my favorite people on the face of the planet, a true friend from the past, turns up the exact week secretly I called the Navy to schedule the Officer Training Test for the third and Final time. Brigham did everything right that night. He must have calculated that Avatar was the longest movie EVER and if we sat there long enough I'd at least rest my head on his shoulder. I did, but not until the last 10 minutes. And as much as I searched for a way to deny him entry into my future plans that night, considering pride, or whatever else was influencing me inside, when it all boiled down to it, it felt too good to be loved for just who I am, and I wanted him to try for my heart, because I really wanted him to win it.

I'm not going to spell out the rest of our story, but just let it be known that there is a lot of love here.

Now I am calling shots at work- somewhat uncomfortably, yes, but at least with conviction. And somehow, miraculously, I am getting just about everything I've ever desired to have. It's ironic that I never really intend to tap into or take over power structures, but I seem to get into it everywhere I go for better or for worse. Fortunately, now I have undeviating trust in God, so whatever happens, I know the Lord is in it. To my true friends, I want you to know how much I love and deeply appreciate you for seeing me through and believing in me like no other. For those people who didn't believe in me, or who have done blatant hurtful things to me, no matter how well-intentioned, including gossip or passing judgement, I just hope you never know how painful that really is. To Brigham, thanks for being like sunshine. I am the happiest, even if I get a little ragey...because you're here.

2010: The Year of Honesty, Integrity, Family Values, Faith, Respect, Conviction and Forgiveness. And Lastly, Success!!!